I was just saying....

I can't remember who said that or where it comes from .... I was just saying.... but it popped into my head and so here it is. So I pretty much suck at this blog thing, but I've been thinking about it a lot lately... so either it's how I think at this time of year (probably due to receiving lots of Christmas cards and thinking of friends and family near and far) or I'm just a 1 month a year blogger.... hmmmm....

OK. So. I'm still working on stimulating the economy... but I have not actually worked since May of 2009. That's right... I got laid off in May. Me. The over achiever, goal getter, workaholic. What actually happened doesn't matter. It was time for me to move over.... Did you know that in China the women are expected to retire at age 50 and men at age 55? This is to make room for the next generation. I'm a fan of this. I will be 50 in 2010.

At first, I had lots of things to do.... I thought, THIS IS GREAT!.... I'll do all those things that are always taking place in the middle of the day that I always wonder, WHO is available in the middle of the day to do this?? So I signed up for a quilting class for beginners and was so excited, but it was canceled due to lack of participation (I was the only one who signed up). Ha ha! And the store never rescheduled or called me back for another class like they promised they would. Sometimes advertising does not work. Lack of advertising never works. Poor customer service is sure to keep the customers away. So I'm not convinced that anyone signs up for those middle of the day classes.

I have worked since I was 10. Regular babysitting jobs. A paper route. Selling odd things like note cards and seeds. I've been in sales forever. I joke that the last time I had a summer off... was when I was 9 years old. I send out resumes for jobs I know I'm overqualified for ... but there's not much out there that I am qualified for. It's an effort that I know will go unanswered. The companies that are hiring are probably getting bombarded with resumes. Craziness.

So. I spend the first few weeks getting ready for a big Memorial Day weekend picnic. Big celebration with over 100 guests. We provide everything because this is a very casual celebration of our marriage. Fun times. But too many people to be able to spend much time with everyone. I spend most of my time helping guests with odd requests. We laugh a lot. Good news is that come Tuesday morning I do not have to trek off to work. I spend the entire week after the party cleaning up. No hurries. It is so great to not be stressed out for the first time in over 20 years.

Sole provider for over 13 years. How can I possibly not earn a living??? Hmm. I realize that the act of going to work is costing me quite a bit of money. I spend my own money on office breakfasts and lunches (for my department). I spend money on lunch almost every day. I buy groceries that I never eat, and eat out a lot. I cook at home maybe 3 times a MONTH! When someone mentions a need, I am very quick to spend to meet that need. Especially since Jen graduated from college and I no longer have her expenses to worry about. She is earning her own living and saving for her next educational experience (grad school in Oxford, England). Fortunately, I have expected this (being laid off) for over a year and I've planned for this to happen. All bills are paid and I have been saving. I have that emergency fund you are supposed to have.... and no bills. No mortgage. No car payment. I have a few anxieties over relying on someone else, should my savings run dry. No panic attacks. Just anxieties. I have a few moments of depressing thoughts. And then, as usual, the person who picks me up..... takes hold of my shoulders and picks me up again. Oh hey... it's me. : )

Others around me lend me support. Not my family. Not co-workers. They are almost, no, pretty much, non-existent. It's actually kind of nice. But Ben is there. Though my fears are that this will allow him to revert to sexist "I'll take care of you my little woman" ways. Yuck. Talk to myself. Could you just relax? Enjoy the time. Think. OK. I think this is a gift. I see now that
this is a blessing.

My biological father died when he was in his mid-fifties. I think that I was heading down that path. Stress. Not taking care of myself physically. I may still end up there.... but I'm going to enjoy the years that lead up to it. Therefore, this is a gift of time. This is a blessing to myself.

I spent the summer enjoying and exploring. I learned how to can vegetables. I made pepper jelly. I spent time with new friends. I spent time with family. I did not spend time counting how many vacation days I had left. Hooray. That in itself is such a blessing. I explored options for career changes. I read books. I joined the local library book discussion group.

In September I flew to Venice, Italy to meet my daughter, Jen, who was exploring Europe on her own. She started in London in mid-August and spent a week in Germany, a week in Poland and a week in Austria, before meeting up with me and allowing me to jump in on her backpacking trek through Europe. We explored Venice, Verona and Rome, before heading north to Geneva and then west to Bordeaux, France. Then it was back to England for the Jane Austen festival in Bath. All traveling by train. Just a pack on our backs.

I discovered Italians eat a lot and that pasta is just one course in what is usually a 5 course meal. I can walk all day with a pack on my back.
Bottled water in Europe is only 30 cents if you buy it at the grocery store.
Hand washing underwear is not that bad.
The 7 hills of Rome. Ancient Rome is incredible.
Buying the train pass in the U.S. is the better deal.
I'm even more of a fan of mass transportation.
Geneva is very peaceful on a Sunday.
Hostels are not just for youth. Not even close. All ages. Families welcome. This is how Europe vacations and it is an awesome way to travel in Europe.
Grocery stores are as exciting to me as they ever were. You can learn a lot in a grocery store.
We did not find Karaoke in Italy. Too busy eating multi-course meals. : )
Sitting in the sun at the train station in southern France is a great time to work on a healthy tan.
Bordeaux, France spent millions cleaning up their city (it is gleaming!) and they should be commended for taking the risk and doing a fabulous job of it. Belgium should take note. : )
I can survive without a cell phone as long as I have weekly access to my email.
You can always find a cyber cafe in Europe. Open your eyes.
Post cards mailed from Milan may never be delivered. I mailed 12. To date none have been received. I mailed 10 from Bath, England and some of those have been sited. Did you get yours?
My daughter is a very capable person.
Pesto sauce, sliced cheese, a loaf of italian bread and a bottle of Fanta do make a really good meal, especially when enjoyed en route by train.
When traveling in Europe plan to not be in a hurry.
Take the wine tour. Always take the full day wine tour. It's alwas been worth the money and includes a lot of history. In France, take the wine tour. In Bordeaux, take the full day, includes lunch, wine tour. You'll spend the morning walking through the history of Bordeaux, followed by lunch at a fabulous fromage restaurant (not fancy, but wonderful food), and then a tour of a winery in the country and a country village. Fabulous. Jen and I have been on 2 wine tours in France and both were worth the money, full of history and fabulous experiences that we still talk about. If you're in France, take the wine tour.
The Eurostar is quite a production but we know of no better way to get from France to England.
When in Bath, take the comedy tour. We did this at the recommendation of travel author Rick Steves. Instead of the ghost tour, we took the Bizarre Bath tour and we laughed ourselves silly. Worth every pence!
The Jane Austen Festival promenade parade makes you feel like you have walked into your favorite Austen novel. You can't help but look for your Mr. Darcy. And you will likely find him, along with Jane and her friends.

OK. Must end here and get some sleep..... busy day tomorrow. ; )